I'm sitting here, writing to Spirit, talking to Spirit and had a revelation of, "Maybe I'll blog..." That's a bright idea, eh? I'm joking with Kuthumi tonight. And writing to him and about him, speaking about him and we're in a funny space together and are going to share that with you. The Master/Disciple relationship is a funny one sometimes, and a serious one too. But for the moment, I'm enjoying him and his humor. And the words are far and few between, but the love is very strong. He's attuning me briefly to his love and says, "If you sit back, breathe, relax and allow the love will deepen and flow more strongly, even as it is already flowing quite well as you can feel."
I'm listening to Twameva with Deva Premal again and ooohhhh....the love is just flowing and then another guide comes sweeping in, we'll call this the love guide. I have a love guide who is one of my favorites...and one wonders...how is Kuthumi not my favorite? Well, he is of course, but the love guide is something else altogether which I cannot explain in words to you, at least not right now.
This love guide is a Master at making us feel in love. He oozes a warm fuzzy heart feeling in a way to me that other energies do not. This being who we'll just call the "love guide" for now is familiar to many on the path. If you're reading my blog, you likely know who he is. I actually don't write about him much and this is the first time that I've openly discussed these two guides in this way publicly.
We had a beautiful time at East/West bookstore this weekend. For any readers who attended, thank you for coming and taking part in the magical alchemy of what took place. Today we had a very sacred session with a Master, for which I am very grateful and so much love and peace was served. As the day and evening has progressed and as the energy has shifted, I am able to better perceive what took place today and can feel the Masters' presence and appreciation streaming through for what we humans do with our "free" time.
I am blissed to spend my "free" time with them. It is what I do. It is my favorite thing to do. They are my family and have always been.
I keep getting reminders today of the book I recommended last night during class, Radical Acceptance by Tara Brach. She's a Vipassana and Insight meditation teacher and I first read this book many years ago at the Kripalu Yoga Center in Lenox, MA. When I was a middle school French teacher, this was my favorite place to spend free time; in the Berkshire Mountains, overlooking a beautiful lake, rolling hills, mountains, and sleeping at Kripalu a former Jesuit monastery. This scene is so fresh in my mind and it makes me want to return even though Kripalu has become a bit more of a zoo since I first began going there 10 years ago. So I am asking myself what from this book I need to remember, and I'm wondering where my copy of it is. :-) I moved recently so I'm not quite sure where I put it.
Radical Acceptance solidified for me this practice of moving through deep emotions and healing from the inside out. In silence, breathing, as you tune into what is happening in the emotional body or in the energy body, noticing how do we really feel underneath the masks, the distractions, the vices, etc? Sometimes we need to feel for a few minutes and just breathe to sense what is there. Sometimes we need to exercise or do yoga to break up the stored energy or emotions to release them. I am known by my closest friends for feeling deeply and for being able to cry with great ease. Curse or blessing, you can decide, but tonight, as I watch my emotions, as I examine myself, and inquire within, with the presence of my guides, the guides who led class this weekend, I am told to drink more water. Haha! See, just when you think you are going to get great guidance, you get told to drink more water. Love that!!
So the profound instant message here is to drink more water. It's great simple advice for us all really. I see a mountain and I know which energy is stepping forward. And sense that drinking water in silence is tonight's meditation. Sit in silence and drink more water. Breathe. Sit in silence and drink more water. And with the repetition and the goofy simplicity, I laugh and appreciate the simple messages the guides give. Just when we think something sorely profound is about to happen, we get told to be quiet and hydrate. For me, this is really great news because this means all is very well. No lecture right now, at least for the moment. And that's true, this one doesn't lecture. That's the other one. :-) I feel like I'm watching a show of Sesame Street, as I observe all the characters interact and it is like watching a cartoon. Somewhat more serious than that, but as playful as that at the same time.
I am remembering some experiences of the past three years of post-service symptoms that us who do this service experience and I am grateful for the lessons. So as I breathe and drink my water, then I feel the feelings about that. And then we're back to embracing those feelings, with the heart of the Buddha, as Tara Brach wrote in her book. As we examine the past, and feel the feelings of the past, to heal them, we breathe into them, embracing them like children, and step deeper into the water of emotional healing, to honor the sensitivity, opening the heart and feeling the gratitude and the pain all at the same time. We can feel love, gratitude and pain simultaneously. The human emotional body is pretty miraculous. This is the essence of emotional releasement and processing. Feeling greater love, be it self-love or love for others, requires feeling, opening the heart, and to feel love more deeply, we have to first learn to feel it ALL. And as our hearts open to it ALL, the pain can release and create more space for love. And with great love, can come joy, but at times, it can bring tears. I have this sense right now of viewing all of the past pain, with a relative sense of detachment, while feeling a mild sense of grief, but it's a light feeling, because we are in the presence of so much great love. And my heart gets cracked open wider and wider as I type to share this experience of moving deeply into the heart space with you.
This is what divine mother does. She holds her heart open so we can all heal and be loved inside of it. She embraces us for as long as we want or need. And that is what Radical Acceptance can do for us. I'm reminded of the mantra given to me by Ammaji in Castro Valley last June. I asked for a mantra to cultivate acceptance. So the mantra is to deepen contentment and acceptance of what is.
When we can embrace all of our Self and all of life with this heart of the Buddha, we find greater peace and love. We settle into acceptance, even amidst pain or grief. It reminds me of when someone crosses over, how we feel grief, but as we feel the grace and presence of God, there is this comfort and relief which can bring peace at the same time. So we feel love, peace and grief all at once. And as I type, I feel everyone in Japan. And with this as I type, I feel the presence of Quan Yin. And what she is offering tonight is a reminder of our heart's ability to hold love and compassion as we accept our own life and pain and then can offer the same love and compassion to those who are in even greater suffering than our own.
So for anyone in pain tonight or in grief, wherever in the world you may be, this heart is open to you for healing and love. You can step inside for as long as you'd like. And with that will come the love of many Masters and Angels who will shower so much love on you that when you do feel and open to it, you will cry, or maybe laugh too. That is the heart of God. I pray we all open to that and feel tonight, so we can grow this collective heart of the planet and come together. I love you. I love you. I love you.
When we allow that presence to sink in, all will be healed. I see my friend Brad who passed away a while ago, and so I share this for those of you that know him. He's smiling at this blog post, he's loving it, he's loving watching us all from where he stands today, rather where he floats and flies around. Brad is a sweet soul, I'm grateful to share his presence with you. You haven't left, you're right here. In fact, you're closer than you were when you were in form. It serves as a reminder that when our loved ones change form, they often are closer to us from the other side and all it takes is an openness in perception, a shift in the body or mind so we can allow ourselves to feel them. For some, the grief is so dense, they cannot feel. But with healing assistance, everyone can learn to feel this presence of a loved one. It's so beautiful when they heal and cross over. They are angels to us. It is a happy awareness. Brad is so supportive to those of us he knew, I am thinking of many of us who knew him and can see their grief still, and he wants to tell us to be happy here and know he's happy and watching us.
Enjoying the silence, stillness and simplicity while watching a mild-tempered egoic resistance to it at the same time...this is the equivalent to about a 90% state of surrender. :-) What happens when you give yourself over to the entire 100%?
This makes for a fun evening practice, no?
Love and blessings to all,
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